Friday, February 29, 2008
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Thank you for being a friend / AA Fur Ril Fur Ril
AA is in the house. If you don't know yet, that's Aging Asians - a new sub sect of Black PANDA.
Who's with me? I know Artner is... those are her lotions alternating with mine up above. (Who's are who's...?... if you've been reading, you know). But, fur ril, my late twenties have come and gone and now I'm at the dawn of a new decade. Things just aren't the same. I'm speaking for myself here, but I have heard from other AA's (AA's that don't even know they're AA's) that age is creeping up with them. That said, here are my tips to keeping your boyish/girlish looks when looking for daddy...
~ Work the dimples (if you gottem' - workem')
~ Exfoliate, mask, and moisturize.
I use Peppermint exfoliator, Vanilla mask, and Carrot Moisturizer-all from Sabon.
~ Beauty Sleep.
A note: this option doesn't seem to work for many of my over-achieving friends. Kinda harsh for tranny messes and hot gawbuj too.
~ Organic food - a tip from "Peanut Butter & Beans" Diva. Organic chocolate chip cookies... mmm....
~ When all else fails, Fucking Lie. We're Asian and got a leg up on our pale faced friends. Don't Westenize dem eyes, recognize...
Ooohh Oohhh - AA - MAINTAIN!!! Or else we'll be these broads sooner than later!!!
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Is that your asshole I smell?
If it is, I like it.
I've always known that Tom Ford's schtick was packaging sex. Butt (yes, it's intended), I have to say that this ad was a bit shocking when I first saw it- just a tad bit. It is quite apropos since it's running on the rear end of BUTT No. 22. That said, still a cumpelling image. The hands, the shine (lube, clearly), the hair (!!!). If Tom Ford was looking to create something that stimulated the olfactory in addition to the retinas, I think he succeeded - at least in this shitpacker.
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Friday, February 22, 2008
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
The Future Father of Hijiki Pixel
Fiiieerce
Fi-Yas
FEARCE!
Feece!
fffiiirece
frc!
faaaabulous.
fbls
FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAABUL-US
F i r c e.
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Happy Valentine's Day!
my ode to Impact (the typeface) + LA Gear (the shoe). Don't hate on unfashionable design. Grrr.
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Monday, February 11, 2008
ノ ス タ ル ジ ヤ
The title of this entry is an English word that has been transliterated into Japanese. Here's the code. What cha got, huh?
Sunday, February 10, 2008
Saturday, February 9, 2008
...
So... I'm cute, right? I thought I was. I get told I am. So what's up with me gettin' no love. Buss what had happened.
Friday, February 8th
6:45 PM
I gathered with a bunch of friends and congratulated DLS on being promoted to assistant Vice President. Clearly DLS is set on renaming her company "Oppenheimer Funds of the Saints". Like 35% of my friends, Ms. Thing is very ambitious. After throwing one down, gossiping about that girl Christian and her skills on Project Runway, and modeling my very cool look of "Hobo Chic", I decide its time to hit the streets and find a daddy.
Here's a map of my pathetic evening with a detailed description of the events to follow.
Start (Union Square) / 9ish
"Where the fuck am I going", I think to myself. Seeing as though I had not eaten before the celebratory toast, I needed to eat. I wandered Union Square with plans to meet up with The Glitteress for dinner. Ultimately, she had to go feed her dog and left me hungry on the streets. After much deliberation, I decide that I'm going to go to have some Japanese by myself in the East Village.
9:30
Alot of people with people waiting to eat with other people. Most of these people are Asian. I'm on St. Mark's trying to figure out where I'm going to eat solo. Not wanting to be by myself in Izakayas packed with pandas out the wazoo, I head west and think I'll grab something on the way to Christopher Street, where the bears are.
Hot Dogs / 9:50
2 franks w/ sauerkraut and mus-dud, large papaya = $3.50. The Filipino guys running the joint must be cleaning up.
Bears / 10:20
From panda town to bearville and ain't a damn thing changed. I'm on Christopher Street contemplating entering either Ty's or The Hangar. Both seem to be roaring with activity, but I don't seem to be in the mood to be in a bar by myself. It's become so trite. Nor do I feel like cranking up the notch and being "extra" in an attempt to call attention to myself with the hopes of meeting Daddy Right.
I'm thinking about my friends (or lack there of) and wondering how my situation has really changed since being abroad on my own. When I was there I always had to make new friends. I was constantly doing things by myself. Here in NY I imagined that that would be different. But alas, I still feel alone.
Twitterin' from the streets.
I'm beginning to feel like this guy
Friday, February 8th
6:45 PM
I gathered with a bunch of friends and congratulated DLS on being promoted to assistant Vice President. Clearly DLS is set on renaming her company "Oppenheimer Funds of the Saints". Like 35% of my friends, Ms. Thing is very ambitious. After throwing one down, gossiping about that girl Christian and her skills on Project Runway, and modeling my very cool look of "Hobo Chic", I decide its time to hit the streets and find a daddy.
Here's a map of my pathetic evening with a detailed description of the events to follow.
Start (Union Square) / 9ish
"Where the fuck am I going", I think to myself. Seeing as though I had not eaten before the celebratory toast, I needed to eat. I wandered Union Square with plans to meet up with The Glitteress for dinner. Ultimately, she had to go feed her dog and left me hungry on the streets. After much deliberation, I decide that I'm going to go to have some Japanese by myself in the East Village.
9:30
Alot of people with people waiting to eat with other people. Most of these people are Asian. I'm on St. Mark's trying to figure out where I'm going to eat solo. Not wanting to be by myself in Izakayas packed with pandas out the wazoo, I head west and think I'll grab something on the way to Christopher Street, where the bears are.
Hot Dogs / 9:50
2 franks w/ sauerkraut and mus-dud, large papaya = $3.50. The Filipino guys running the joint must be cleaning up.
Bears / 10:20
From panda town to bearville and ain't a damn thing changed. I'm on Christopher Street contemplating entering either Ty's or The Hangar. Both seem to be roaring with activity, but I don't seem to be in the mood to be in a bar by myself. It's become so trite. Nor do I feel like cranking up the notch and being "extra" in an attempt to call attention to myself with the hopes of meeting Daddy Right.
I'm thinking about my friends (or lack there of) and wondering how my situation has really changed since being abroad on my own. When I was there I always had to make new friends. I was constantly doing things by myself. Here in NY I imagined that that would be different. But alas, I still feel alone.
Twitterin' from the streets.
I'm beginning to feel like this guy
Postcards / Porn 10:30
Pass by a magazine store with all of those NY tschochkes for sale. Since I wasn't that far from Christopher Street at that point, I thought that I'd be able to find the latest copy of Euro Bear Magazine. Unfortunately, they didn't have it. Wound up Buying some postcards to send to some folks in Japan. ET phone home.
One purchase.
Subway / 10:45
Thinking to myself I'm going to give it another shot and go for a drink at GYM in Chelsea. There will be lots of furry guys there, I think. At the very least I can have a cocktail and relax before I have haul myself back to the B-Ron-X.
10:55 / Chelsea
Skip into Barracuda to see who might be in there. It seemed to be a gnome party. Didn't see any signs outside. Don't need the gnomes tonight, I think. Piss - keep it moving.
After Barracuda, I decide to take a peek in The View... this was on the monitors there
lol
11:00 / GYM / Pinkberry
The last stop / try of the night. As I had Expected, GYM was packed with alot of clunky bears, furry bears, sluggish bears, virile bears, bespeckled bears, smelly bears. The forest seemed packed.
Cosmo = $7.50. Ugh. The lame vodka in the drink must be why my head hurts right now. I keep on swearing to myself that I am going to stop with the vodka, but I never seem to learn my lesson.
GYM winds up being upsetting. More people. More friends. More Cameraderie. More me alone.
And now a word from our sponsor.
OK - so I'm watching LOST, and I see this ad for the New KY product, I N T R I G U E. LUBRICATION COMMERCIALS ON PRIME TIME TV?! Why not, right? But check out the packaging re-haul of this "personal lubricant". Fancy Schman-cy. Interesting how KY corporation is making it's way into more mainstream media / advertising and creating an image that is less, oh, I don't know, skanky, and more metallic purple.
I got my free sample for a cute twink that was part of the KY crew that entered GYM.
Twink 1 to Twink 2: Smells like a straight bar!
Me: lol
Those twinks - gotta hand it to them.
Got my lube - drunk my vodka - time for ... Pinkberry? Why not attempt to drown my sorrow in yogurt.
11:43 / Crosstown Bus (mmm cutie driver - insatiable)
12: 00 BxM7
All in all , a pretty lame night. Felt friendless. Maybe I just didn't give it my all. I for sure didn't. But, I have to say who wants to give it their all all the time all by themself?
Pass by a magazine store with all of those NY tschochkes for sale. Since I wasn't that far from Christopher Street at that point, I thought that I'd be able to find the latest copy of Euro Bear Magazine. Unfortunately, they didn't have it. Wound up Buying some postcards to send to some folks in Japan. ET phone home.
One purchase.
Subway / 10:45
Thinking to myself I'm going to give it another shot and go for a drink at GYM in Chelsea. There will be lots of furry guys there, I think. At the very least I can have a cocktail and relax before I have haul myself back to the B-Ron-X.
10:55 / Chelsea
Skip into Barracuda to see who might be in there. It seemed to be a gnome party. Didn't see any signs outside. Don't need the gnomes tonight, I think. Piss - keep it moving.
After Barracuda, I decide to take a peek in The View... this was on the monitors there
lol
11:00 / GYM / Pinkberry
The last stop / try of the night. As I had Expected, GYM was packed with alot of clunky bears, furry bears, sluggish bears, virile bears, bespeckled bears, smelly bears. The forest seemed packed.
Cosmo = $7.50. Ugh. The lame vodka in the drink must be why my head hurts right now. I keep on swearing to myself that I am going to stop with the vodka, but I never seem to learn my lesson.
GYM winds up being upsetting. More people. More friends. More Cameraderie. More me alone.
And now a word from our sponsor.
OK - so I'm watching LOST, and I see this ad for the New KY product, I N T R I G U E. LUBRICATION COMMERCIALS ON PRIME TIME TV?! Why not, right? But check out the packaging re-haul of this "personal lubricant". Fancy Schman-cy. Interesting how KY corporation is making it's way into more mainstream media / advertising and creating an image that is less, oh, I don't know, skanky, and more metallic purple.
I got my free sample for a cute twink that was part of the KY crew that entered GYM.
Twink 1 to Twink 2: Smells like a straight bar!
Me: lol
Those twinks - gotta hand it to them.
Got my lube - drunk my vodka - time for ... Pinkberry? Why not attempt to drown my sorrow in yogurt.
11:43 / Crosstown Bus (mmm cutie driver - insatiable)
12: 00 BxM7
All in all , a pretty lame night. Felt friendless. Maybe I just didn't give it my all. I for sure didn't. But, I have to say who wants to give it their all all the time all by themself?
Friday, February 8, 2008
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